Top Ten Films of The Year

The cinema. Place of refuge. Place of teenagers making out. Place of parents getting confused over plot points. Place of vintage sweets so old they are priced accordingly as antiques. Place of repetitive phone adverts. Place where Kevin Bacon’s misunderstands the rules of a game named after him. And British culture. Place where I laughed, cried, and ate a tiny little pizza roll from Tesco’s.

My films of the year in this place.

10. Blue Ruin.

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Man with beard learns that revenge is best served without a beard.

And the main actor is called Macon Blair. Rhymes with Bacon Lair.

That should be enough reason for you to see it.

9. Cold in July

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This film won’t leave you cold. (AHAHAHAHAHAHA)

Wait

(AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA)

The genre of the movie changes so often that Netflix would be all like *shrugs*

It’s a home invasion. No it’s a thriller! No it’s a mystery! It’s a swedish musical comedy! No it’s… doesn’t matter Just put it in the Michael C Hall: Life After Dexter, and give it a watch.

8. Boyhood.

“I just thought there would be more..” says Patricia Arquette and single mothers all over the land finish off the sentence for her.

Delicious Pie.

7. The Lego Movie

Whose cockles have not been warmed by this movie?  WHOSE?

6. The Edge of Tomorrow

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You like Tom Cruise more than you think. Remember Rain Man? Minority Report? Top Gun? Collateral? Tropic Thunder?

There is a Cruise for all seasons.

Recommending this movie has been part of my long running campaign to remind people of this. Mostly they ignore me, but if you haven’t seen this pacey thriller, give it a try. Sure, it was mismarketed, and the name changed three times but it’s good. Promise.

5. Captain America 2.

For me, a far more successful movie than The Avengers. No Iron Man to chew the scenery, and a well rounded Black Widow. She has been given at least three more personality traits. Plus Robert Redford’s hair is just the best.

4. Obvious Child.

It’s hard to avoid mentioning abortion when describing this movie, because the main character Donna’s (played by Jenny Slate) impregnation is the product of a one night stand, and thus the abortion is part of the films twist on the romantic comedy genre, however you don’t necessarily want to draw attention to it because it shouldn’t be the unspoken wife in the attic that it is, and it isn’t the most laboured over element of the movie, more an inciting incident which causes Donna to reflect on her life up to now. It lays an odd sort of stamp unto the film – some proclaiming it as a beacon, controversial in its forthright attitude of dealing with the subject in a very matter of fact way, and therefore representing the truth about women owning their bodies more than people want to see. Yes women are rude, they have sex, they talk about their vaginas in comedy clubs, they have abortions. And this film isn’t afraid to say it. It’s reputation precedes it.

However labelling it boundary pushing way is sort of depressing to me. How far have we not come. It has the detrimental effect of drawing attention to women’s experiences and language, which for many is normal, and the depiction of this ladies experience shouldn’t seem controversial. Judd Apatow films haven’t been labelled shocking for the way they show men talking, sitting around bitching about how awful their womenfolk are and calling each other ‘gay’ for lols, because you know, that’s how men talk right? Isn’t it refreshing someone was finally willing to show it on screen? PHEW. This film shows the warmth of female friendship and how silly and gross (normal) women can be. The fact she works as a comedian, talks about her pants, cries after break ups and decides quickly to have an abortion. Part and parcel of some human women’s experiences.

But to touch on it: The whole subject matter is handled in an appropriate and sensitive way, it is not milked over for emotionally manipulative purposes, rather a visit to planned parenthood and a realistic conversation is had (reminded me of the last scene in Captain Phillips,) and a decision is made, and then the ramifications are not over whether it was the right/wrong decision but rather how it lies in the grand scheme of her characters journey up to now. What is she doing with her life, and is she running away from a potentially great relationship.

YES the relationship is the best thing about this movie. How natural, and funny, and sweet and adorable is is. The conversations between Donna and Max are wonderful, and it is secretly the sweetest rom com of the year.

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3. Nightcrawler

Mr Gyllenhaal plays total raging sociopath well. Sick, twisted and goes well with Salt and Vinegar Snack a Jacks.

2. Guardians of The Galaxy

Elevator pitch: The brother of the actor who played Kurt in The Gilmore Girls directs a Marvel movie with characters no-one cares about, and SMASHES it.

Plus Kevin Bacon is a metaphor for bravery.

1. Frank

Wiser people have used better words to describe the feeling in your gut after you have been taken on a emotional rollercoaster akin to Alton Towers Oblivion, but that’s how I felt after Frank.

That’s how I still feel months after seeing it. I still feel a little tug, a little tear, a little shocked I could deal without seeing Michael Fassbender’s face for a whole movie.

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Weird, touching, stupid, great, you know. Watch it.

Honourable mention:

The Raid 2, Snow piercer, Under The Skin.


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